Is this too harsh?

[JeromeBaker]

I'll tell you what, you need to make it clear that your the man of the house and your rules need be followed. Dont be a controlling Ahole but that's the truth. People need to understand that there will be consiquenses to breaking the rules. The only way they'll learn is if they relate pain to disobeying you. Be nice and lay down the rules, but when you enforce em people are gonna go runnin. To be honest with you it sounds like your being submissive to the lazyness your family is infected with. STEP UP! Lay down the law and light a fire under their ass's to pick up their weight. and another thing.........YOU DA MAN!!

[nalbar]

Originally posted by JeromeBaker
I'll tell you what, you need to make it clear that your the man of the house and your rules need be followed. Dont be a controlling Ahole but that's the truth. People need to understand that there will be consiquenses to breaking the rules. The only way they'll learn is if they relate pain to disobeying you. Be nice and lay down the rules, but when you enforce em people are gonna go runnin. To be honest with you it sounds like your being submissive to the lazyness your family is infected with. STEP UP! Lay down the law and light a fire under their ass's to pick up their weight. and another thing.........YOU DA MAN!!

YIKES!!


nalbar

[warlockgp]

How come the baby gets so much slack on the rules???

Rule them with an Iron hand..........

Sorry i'm sleepy, good night.

[sdboogie]

get rid of your expectations and you'll never be dissappointed. People don't seem to change. And life gets to be lonely when we demand it to be our way. The only thing we can change is our perspective. I love my family and gave up the Sunset magazine house fantasy long ago. It's a constant balancing act. Like the pH and calcium in or tanks, one extreme affects the other. Some dose with beer, surfing, God, racecars, etc. (corny reef analogy)

[JeromeBaker]

I disagree. As individuals all capable of making decisions it is up to us to create the quality of life that we deserve and should strive for. Dont give up SDboogie or Suver. It is important that we dont get rid of our expectations. Expectations are the driving force of my life. Expecting myself to suceed in business, expecting myself to succeed in my relationships, whitout my expectations of who I want to be and working hard to live up to them, I am nothing. Without expectations you sit back and tell the world you dont stand for anything. I dont know about you but I STAND UP for what I believe in. Where's you motivation to achieve, to accomplish, to experience life? If you let people walk over you, where is your value? It is a man's responsibilty to be a guide, guiding his family in the right direction. How can a man do this without any direction himself. By teaching some people to pick up some trash you are teaching them common courtesy, you are not sacrificing your happiness but hoping to contribute to anothers through disapline. You said something about preception is reality. In certain ways it is but good luck creating the preception that there's not trash on the floor when you hear it crunching under your feet.

[sdboogie]

We all have our own paths to travel. I've tried to be the sherriff and controller of all around me and it didn't work. Maybe it works for others. Don't confuse letting go with giving up. I try not to have expectations and I have a great family, business and an overall beachin life. The key to any family is communication. As it turns out we all needed to compromise in order to achieve maximum satisfaction. It couldn't be my way or the highway. It couldn't be my wife's way either. Somewhere in the middle. I just don't buy into the millitant, I'm the man and there is only one way to do things - the right way, kind of mentallity. Been there, done that, it didn't work for me.

[JeromeBaker]

Oh I agree for sure. I'm not for that either. It's not right for the man to overpower his family and demand more than is possible for his satisfaction but it is right for a man to be a teacher. Like I said before a guide. I am not married but I teach my girlfriend that she has a say in things as much as I. Her opinion is just as important and there are many things I will and have learned from her. One of my expectations is giving her everything she needs to be truly happy. Including her independence. Not overpowering her but guiding her. A man bases his decisions on logic(well, for the most part. that's what the experts say) a women and children base there decisions on emotion(how is this gonna make me feel). You have to be there to find or at least help to find that line between the two for the people you care about so they are successful in this world. Expectations, common sense and courtesy, respect, structure, guidence, strength, compasion are all thing that arent taught in school but critical to progressing in our society. Those are qualities that us as adults us as men have to instill in our children. Its not a military operation its the love of another and seeing to it that you as a parent provide them with the tools they need to not only survive but to thrive!

[sdboogie]

I think we have the same goals and sense of responsibility. Maybe we just have slightly different approaches. And that's all good!

[JeromeBaker]

Amen brotha